Once I built a Collapse-O-Meter [1], made it run.
Once I built a Collapse-O-Meter [2], now it's done.
Buddy, can you spare some crow?
Congratulations to the 2005 American League Eastern Division champions, the name of whom escapes me. May this title be what you look back on fondly a week from now. And congratulations on having had a schedule backloaded with games against Baltimore just in time to save your sorry asses, to say nothing of the cherry on top of your season: the opportunity to face Braden “I'm OK, I'm not OK” Looper on June 26, quite possibly the difference between your season and those of Boston and Cleveland.
That's about all the graciousness I have in me on this count. I've tipped my cap to these cretins so much over the past decade that I've got carpal-tunnel in my cap-tipping wrist.