Clinch today. Clinch in Pittsburgh. Clinch in front of Xavier Nady. Clinch in front of Jeromy Burnitz. Clinch in front of Ty Wigginton and Marvell Wynne and Tim Foli and anybody else who used to be a Met. Clinch and send them a check.
Clinch today. Clinch on your own. Or clinch by the hand of Wandy Rodriguez. Clinch when the Astros beat the Phillies if you can’t beat the Pirates.
Clinch and call Keith Hernandez’s car service and get home. Clinch and trot out onto the field Monday night as division champs.
Clinch today. Clinch on the afternoon of September 17, 2006, not because of the neat symmetry of clinching on the 20th anniversary of clinching our second-most recent to date National League Eastern Division championship (though that’s well and good) but because of what might very likely happen on the night of September 17, 2006.
Clinch today. Because if you don’t accomplish that small task with a magic number of 1, then another team, whose magic number is momentarily 4, will clinch before us. They get to play their 2006 patsies (speaking of dogs) during the day and again in the evening. A win for them is a loss for the team directly behind them. Who doesn’t think it’s quite possible to probable that the Yankees will sweep the Red Sox Sunday? They do that and they’ve clinched on September 17.
We must clinch September 17. First. In the daytime. Before them. This is not negotiable. This is not “gee, it wouldn’t be as much fun to clinch while they’re in the clubhouse” or “gosh, I have a ticket [and I do] for Monday night” or, heaven help any Mets fan, “Zach Duke is on my fantasy team.” This is one of those few times in the course of this extraordinary season when there is a MUST win. For us. For Houston. Whoever. Preferences are no longer an option.
I do not want to live in a world in which we are not the first New York team to be division champion this particular season.
I do not care how it is done.
Clinch.
Now.
Pittsburgh: Where Dreams Go to Die.
Please, guys. Just do it.
yknow i didn't mind the mets not doing it on friday night — who had time when the bigger concern was pedro? — but last night hurt.
not only do you waste a great outing by hernandez, who let's face it is the ace of the staff right now, but you had the pirates doing the walkoff thing. (if i were feeling more charitable, i'd say let them have it as a highlight in an otherwise dreary season.)
when i saw joe randa at bat, i told my son, uh oh this guy kills us. he didn't get it — he's not used to the mets losing close ones, or late inning games or, this season, losing period. so after heilman walks randa, he's not accepting the possibility of defeat.
boy did that aura get punctured fast.
losing two straight to the pirates is bad in so many ways. and it sends a message to all the post-season folk, lefties, throw lefties, the greener the better.
i agree, clinch. by any means necessary.
I'd just once like to see Joe Randa take one in the coconut & finally balance out his cockeyed face…
Ronny FUCKING Polino…
Yes, one thing your son must learn quickly is that the appearance of Joe Randa signals an immediate trip downhill. A walk was probably the best outcome we could have expected.
But what I'd like to know is, what the heck did Aaron Heilman do to Pittsburgh in a past life? Poison its crops?
I suppose they're sucking again for US. They want to clinch in front of us at home, because they love us. Yes, that's it. It's all for our own good.
For crying out loud. We're not even better than the Yankees anymore now. Why do we always do this? Why do we always falter at the very end and lose in bunches to teams we should be laughing at? WHY???
Did we just get swept by the Pirates?
No, that's not a rhetorical question. Have I misunderstood something? Did we just get swept by the fucking PIRATES?
Put away the champagne. Clinching will no longer be a cause for celebration or joy. It'll just be a relief.
Like finding out that your tumor is benign. You don't break out the bubbly. You breathe a long, exasperated, cathartic sigh.
Zach Duke on the mound. What did we expect? Did anyone ever imagine that we'd be so pissed to have to face the Marlins the Pirates and the Marlins again, cosecutively, in September? It's just not fair. How can we compete with those pitching staffs?
You know who we need? Mike Piazza. You know what his average is against lefties this year? .371!!!! Three. Seven. One. God, we need him. Our entire line up will be Mike and Endy against lefties. That seems fair.
You'll get no argument from me.