Even though it’s an off day, there a ton to report regarding the Mets.
• Willie Randolph is still the manager.
• Fred Wilpon has made no announcements on or off the record regarding Willie Randolph’s status.
• Third baseman David Wright figures to be batting in his usual spot in the order when the Mets play the Cardinals in the first game of the National League Championship Series.
• Shortstop Jose Reyes gets along with him.
• First baseman Carlos Delgado will be at first base.
• Jose Reyes gets along with him, too.
• The NLCS starts Wednesday evening in New York City.
• Home of the Mets.
• Who are managed by Willie Randolph.
• Still.
I also heard that the Mets are continuing to not shop Carlos Beltran.
Golf clap. Brilliant, thank you.
For further entertainment, I direct your attention to the riveting scoop by yesterday's Daily News wherein they devoted an entire article to the question, “So, what does Sal Fasano think?”
Because, you know you were just dying to hear meaningful, deep words of wisdom and Yankee courage from their backup catcher.
Sometimes reality is even funnier than parody.
But just in case, I think Ramon needs to work on his press handling skills.
This just in: Ramon Castro has not called for Willie Randolph to not be fired. Chris Woodward hasn't chimed in, too.
You mean Sal “Johnnycakes” Fasano?
OK so what's wrong with this picture…?
In yesterday'sDaily News coverage of the Mets — y'know, the New York team that's STILL PLAYING — merits 1 whole page of coverage.
The Yankees — who have been, y'know, ELIMINATED — warrant 12 FRIKKIN' PAGES of ink.
Anybody still wanna tell me the News is NOT the Yankkes' house organ…?
Ring. Ring.
(Gloomily) “Hello.”
“Brian, it's Omar.”
“Oh, it's you. Called to rub it in, huh?”
“No, man, you know me, I'm not like that. I'm calling to help you out.”
“How can you help me now? Don't you read the papers?”
“Of course I do, that's why I'm calling. George is down your neck screaming for some immediate action, am I right? To show the fans you're not gonna take an ignominious 3-1 defeat in the first round lying down, yes?”
“Hey, go easy with that 'ignominious' stuff.”
“And you aren't gonna fire Joe, I know. So you have to come up with a player move quick, or risk seeing your club vanish from the tabs for a coupla weeks, and you know how Himself hates that.”
“Don't have to tell me.”
“So here's the thing. You've got to throw somebody overboard, and I think I am gonna be needing a DH in about a week.”
“Man, I told you not to rub it in!”
“No offense, Brian, no offense, I just meant, we can help each other.”
“How?”
“I'll take your number 8 hitter off your hands.”
(Stunned) “Rodriguez? You're kidding!”
“No, really. Put him on the waiver wire, nobody will touch him, and then you can ship him over here in time for me to add him to the roster between series.”
(Brightening) “Hey, that might work. What's he worth to you?”
“I'm prepared to say, 10 million and a first-round pick.”
(Delighted) “Omar, that's great!”
“I'm in a generous mood, so that's all it'll cost you — 10 million and a first-round pick. I'm sure George will cough it up gladly.”
(A bit crestfallen) “Oh. Well. Maybe.”
(Consoling) “Brian, Brian, admit it, it's cheap at the price. He's no use to you any more, and as bad as he is in the clutch, he might still hit a solo shot or two for us in the series. Can't be any worse than Ricky Ledee, right? Russo and Francesa will call you a genius, the fans will calm down and George will leave you alone. Compared to that, what's 10 million and some phenom?”
(Sighing) “I guess you're right. I'll call his agent.”
“One little thing, though … ”
“Yeah?”
“When I release him in February, your insurance pays the out years of his deal, not mine.”
Now that's funny. Althoughat only $16 mill per year (Rangers are eating the rest) I would take him in a heartbeat. After a full brainwashing that removed the last 3 years of his life of course.
And now, for those who may be hard of hearing, I shall repeat the top sports news of the day aided by former Met Chico Escuela, now headmaster of the New York school for the deaf:
Our top story tonight
OUR TOP STORY TONIGHT
Generalissimo Julio Franco is still not dead.
Generalissimo Julio Franco is still not dead.
From reading that in-depth account, you'd never guess that Fasano's been a Yankee for like TEN MINUTES.
I think they administer the Kool-Aid by IV. When you're not on the field, you're required to be hooked up to the tubes.
Tonight on Yankeeography: The Sal Fasano Story
Is that on before or after The Stump Merrill Years?
I wouldn't take him for free. The guy is a wussy and a crybaby and a loser.