It's too hot for a sermon. Just go to Metstradamus [1] and cast a vote for Dick Young [2].
The third annual Hall of Hate balloting is nearing its close, 11:59 tonight. As the dawn approaches, Dick Young is 13 votes behind the All-Star Home Field Rule in the election for the second of two spots available to enshrine the worst of the worst, the lowest of the low, a list that encompasses — in the words of its brilliant creator — the biggest enemies in Mets history, “the ones who the mere mention of their names makes one want to drink a bottle of ipecac just so you can puke all over your dog.”
Hate is a hateful emotion to carry around with you. We're all about the peace and the love here, but sometimes we have to make an exception. Hall of Hate voting is one of those occasions. Metstradamus was clearheaded enough to make the Hall the repository for all our bile. No need to boo or stew. Just vote.
Just vote for Dick Young. And no one else.
True, Metstra fashioned a thoughtful ballot of worthy villains but has imposed a stringent limit on who gets in this year. He says just two. I say just fine. As long as one of them is Dick Young.
Don't bother with anybody else on the ballot. It's too late for Richie Hebner this year. All ticket-splitting detracts from the mission at hand. Don't bother with runaway leader Braden Looper. He's a passing fancy anyway. And certainly don't bother with the All-Star Rule. It shouldn't be in second place. It garnered support in a fit of passion. Metstradamus rendered unto us the ballot in the days following the All-Star Game. Of course the Rule is going to look bad in its wake. It always looks bad. It's a stupid rule. But honestly, it's two weeks since the All-Star Game. Have you thought about it at all lately?
On the other hand, how can the actions of Dick Young not keep occurring to you if you are a Mets fan? Dick Young was M. Donald Grant's key henchman in running Tom Seaver out of New York. Dick Young was the company man of his day (even though he was technically on the Daily News' payroll). Dick Young printed scurrilous gossip — Nancy Seaver is jealous of Ruth Ryan! — and did all he could to remove Tom Seaver from the New York Mets. Dick Young didn't like Tom Seaver, didn't care for modern times, didn't want players who thought for themselves. For Grant (already enshrined) and Young, it was imperative the old order be preserved and that Seaver be dispatched.
Grant's and Young's plan worked like a charm: Seaver was gone and the Mets went into the toilet for the next seven years. Your team was ruined. Your enemies celebrated. You or your forebears were cackled upon. Your baseball life was in ruins.
How can you not hate that? How can you not hate Dick Young? Even if you weren't around in 1977, how can you look back on the history of your club, the club you shape at least part of your identity around, and not want the world to know Dick Young, one of the most powerful columnists New York ever read, was one the most hateful men who ever lived?
American League gets home field advantage in the World Series? So what? We're talking about the single most important player in Mets history and the single worst move in Mets history. M. Donald Grant pulled the trigger. Dick Young cleaned the gun. Together, they destroyed the New York Mets [3].
Do your heritage a favor. Do your self-esteem a favor. Vote Dick Young for the Metstradamus Hall of Hate. [2] You have until one minute before midnight tonight. Go. Get it done. You'll feel better knowing you did the right thing.