The Earth keeps going around the sun; the Mets keep going in circles.
On Sunday night they dropped the rubber game [1] of their series with the Red Sox in numbingly familiar fashion: no hitting, bad pitching, bad defense. To which we might add that they looked torpid and useless, trudging around morosely while being dismantled by Boston relievers no one had ever heard of. (OK, I’d heard of Joely Rodriguez [2]. That didn’t make it better.)
If this is the setup for a wild-card run, well, it’s sure one hell of an okie-doke.
Another week of playing like … well, like the 2023 Mets ought to bring a merciful end to delusions about contention, formally shifting the conversation to what the Mets might be able to obtain as sellers. Which is … what, exactly?
Sure, someone will probably help themselves to David Robertson [3], and a veteran reliever such as Adam Ottavino [4] or Brooks Raley [5] would likely find a market. But beyond that, who wants what we’d be selling?
Who’s paying some pro-rated chunk of $43 million to watch Max Scherzer [6] gamely explain yet again that he’s working hard on not being bad, or to see if Justin Verlander [7] can consistently be more than a No. 4 starter? Who’s going to think they’d get a Carlos Carrasco [8] different than the guy who was strafed at Fenway while the ESPN crew embarrassed themselves asking Rafael Devers [9] moronic questions about ice cream? Who’s going to pay for Tommy Pham [10] and his obviously still not healed groin? Is someone going to see Mark Canha [11] and his middling production as a difference maker? Starling Marte [12] can’t even endure bright light right now, to say nothing of big-league pitching.
Not even full Blow It Up mode is likely to work: What would you get for Pete Alonso [13] given that he’s been an offensive nonentity for a month?
Rather than speculate about the depressing returns for these various old, hurt or underwhelming commodities, I’d like the Mets to consider another tack: trade me.
Think about it: Wouldn’t it be wonderful to wake up as a fan of the Orioles or the Reds, dreaming of the postseason, marveling at your new surroundings and thinking about how you might be able to help your new club?
I don’t want to read about Double-A lottery tickets who might prove valuable if they improve their mechanics or strike-zone judgment (spoiler: they won’t). I want a reason to care about baseball and a goal that isn’t awaiting me in some other season.
Hey Steve: Trade me!