One of the ads in regular Mets rotation right now is for rebranded cable company Spectrum, and features a pair of monsters under a little girl’s bed during the night. One monster is honked off about fees for some Spectrum competitor (I can’t remember which, because I don’t care) and complaining tendentiously and loudly about this state of affairs to his fellow boogeyman — loudly enough to wake up the child on the other side of the mattress.
It’s a funny concept, but it’s the little things that really make it work. Like the aggrieved monster getting so worked up that he can no longer articulate his roster of complaints, falling back on a helplessly frustrated, all-encompassing “it’s bad.” To which the other monster retorts: “you’re bad — at this!” They’re interrupted by the annoyed little girl, who tells them she can hear them, then throws her hands up when the complaining monster can’t let it go.
Last night those 30 seconds were vastly more entertaining than the three hours of dreadful, deeply boring baseball in which they were embedded. The Mets began the game with an uncharacteristic display of life as Curtis Granderson hit a leadoff homer, then had Rich Hill in their sights in the fourth inning, loading the bases with no one out for Jose Reyes.
You can probably guess what came next: Jose struck out. So did Gavin Cecchini. And so did Tyler Pill.The Mets had turned their golden opportunity into leaden reality. Womp-womp.
In the bottom of the inning a Logan Forsythe double gave the Dodgers the lead and a three-run homer from Yasiel Puig made the remaining innings academic, unless your tastes ran to watching Neil Ramirez do Neil Ramirez things. (If Neil were the boogeyman, the little girl from the ad would have doubled off the wall and gone back to sleep.)
Puig’s homer came with a side of stupid: he admired it and Cadillac’ed, Wilmer Flores took exception, Puig took exception to the exception, Travis d’Arnaud muttered something that was ignored, Puig had a between-innings colloquy with Reyes and Yoenis Cespedes and that was pretty much it until the postgame, when … you know what, I’ve wasted too much time on this one as it is. If you see a cloud that your inner Gossage needs to yell at, load up Google and knock yourself out.
Anyway, I was thinking about the monsters under the bed, the little girl on top of it, the Mets, us and who’s who.
My first thought was that the monsters are your recappers, trapped beneath the weight of a season gone awry and so besieged by terribleness that all we can do is sputter that “it’s bad.” But that doesn’t quite fit: we haven’t done anything wrong, except root for a team put on this Earth to suck the joy out of baseball.
Maybe the monsters are the Mets — because they certainly are bad at this, and going nowhere.
Yeah, that fits better. Which would mean the little girl is all of us, lying there witnessing failure when we should be sleeping. Like her, at this point all we can do is shrug and wait for morning.
“What’s our record, Larry?”
No chance Matz throws at Puig. But man, I’d be rooting for it. I know its caveman mentality, but the Mets need a good bench clearing brawl. They are softer than a Mets Helmet ice cream by the time you get back to your seat in a mid-August game. If they did have a brawl, I suspect 5 guys would go on the DL, but hey, maybe then we’d see Rosario.
Why should Puig be thrown at? He performs. The Mets don’t. If the Mets don’t like that, there’s a much simpler solution than throwing baseballs at people like a petulant child: win.
Because baseball is our national pastime and representative of our national spirit and we don’t teach our children to disrespect opponents and shouldn’t accept that behavior at any level. If it happens, you get plunked. At least that’s the way it’s gone from May 4th, 1869 until a few years ago. I’m still in favor of hustling around the basepaths and showing respect. Bat flips and “me” stuff, not so much. For the record I didn’t like the end of the season stuff from the Mets last year – Asdrubal and Loney’s behavior on the walk-offs was bush league and, for me, took away from both moments. Maybe I’m just showing my age.
I totally agree on the winning part, Seth. We need a lot more of that.
I agree with you, too. I didn’t like that end of year showboating last year.
Couldn’t agree with you more Gil. It’s a shame what’s been happening to baseball and they way it is now played.
I am a traditionalist in almost every sense of the word. But I don’t mind the hot-dogging. It’s fun to hit home runs! It’s fun to strike out the opponent’s best hitter! A bat flip, a little cadillacking… it adds fun and flavor to the game. Pitchers don’t like it? Don’t serve up gopher balls. “Awwww, the other team was mean to us!” What is this, Little League? Take revenge like men, by beating the other team. Not whining about their comportment.
God forbid we “rush” Rosario. I remember Dodgers getting blasted for “rushing” Bellinger in April after a slew of OF injuries. He was not ready. Would fail and ruin him for future. And hey they could always fill in with the likes of Scott Van Slyke. You know the rest of the story.
Something about hearing Josh Lewin say “bases loaded, no outs” last night made me groan, sigh, and say “oh, no” under my breath. That is learned behavior. Does any other fan base react like that?
Yup
There’s an anecdote that engineers like to tell when tasked with a project going very badly:
“The original idea was to drain the swamp – but that was before we were up to our necks in alligators! Now our only occupation is alligator control.”
You know that when Neil Ramirez is summoned from the bullpen – there are alligators all over the place.
The fact that Ramirez is even there to be summoned tells me all I need to know about the 2017 Mets.
Each season, month, game, is like a chapter which stems from last year and leads into next year.
It will be strange to see many of guys in different uniforms come the trading deadline.
I’ve taken to listening to the Mets while watching Ghost Adventures. Possession, hauntings and maybe even alien abduction is the perfect backdrop to the 2017 Mets.
Bringing Rosario up at this point would be akin to installing a backyard swimming pool after learning your house was on fire.
I agree. This isn’t a case of bring up Conforto because the starting pitchers and closer are contender quality, the Mets are in arm’s reach of the Nationals in the standings, and the Mets just need some more offense to contend for real.
In their current state, if the Mets have a plan for Rosario with a schedule, they may as well stick to it.
Well, at least the season should get a little interesting at the trade deadline when our bogeymets become sellers (one must hope!)
Not sure what they may get back, but it will be good to see some spaces cleared for some young talent.
Yes, at this point why expose Rosario to this tire fire?
Bring him in after the deadline with team expectations re-set, his own role more defined.
Not too long ago it was wondered whether and when wright might rejoin the team. It seems the question should have been phrased: by when will the team join wright?
Here’s where we’re at right now. Based on ERA, Tyler Pill is an above-average Mets pitcher.
Yes, monsters. Be afraid, be very afraid.
At least Pill gives you what you could reasonably expect from a AAA pitcher pressed into service. That he’s no. 4 in era among our starters with a clean 5.00 does say a lot.