The New York weather report Monday? Cloudy, with falling confetti. Technically it rained on and off yesterday, but you couldn’t tell from the sense of sunshine pervading what has become the most reliably joyous event on the Metropolitan Area October calendar, the Elimination Day Parade.
Goodbye gloom, hello Elimination!
This year’s Elimination Day Parade may have been the best one yet, which is high praise, indeed, considering they’ve been held annually 1903 (except for the 27 times it was cancelled by circumstances beyond the organizers’ control). I’m always surprised Elimination Day has never been codified as a federal, state and/or municipal holiday, given the celebration of the human spirit it embodies. Government offices were open, mail was delivered, banks did business, alternate side of the street parking was in effect and sanitation pickups were made. The last part was most understandable in light of the theme of this year’s Elimination Day Parade: A Clean Sweep. I believe they used that in 2012, 1980, 1976 and 1963, too, but if you’ve got a winner, why not run it out there as often as possible?
I realize some purists quibble with the creeping commercialization of the Elimination Day Parade, harking back to the era when John McGraw stood on the steps of City Hall and scowled haughtily while the masses roared their approval, but I thought enlisting corporate sponsor Primatene MIST, a brand that invites users to Breathe Easy Again, was most appropriate for the occasion. And thanks should go out as well to the broom-producing members of the American Brush Manufacturers Association; the Canyon of Zeroes never looked spiffier. As for how the scene sounded, it goes without saying that the legendary horn section of the visiting Lake Erie Marching Midge Band had everybody buzzing.
Grand Marshal Troy Glaus — so honored in commemoration of the 20th anniversary of his three home runs and 1.264 OPS in the 2002 ALDS — demonstrated fine form leading the procession. Dignitaries Sandy Koufax, Johnny Bench, Ken Griffey, Jr., and Josh Beckett beamed with pride from the reviewing stand, knowing the cause they stood for so heroically has strode on without interruption every autumn from 2010 forward. You’ve probably seen the photos taken by Elimination Day Parade Most Valuable Photographer Randy Johnson. So many smiles on so many faces…
It’s hard to say which moment elicited the biggest cheer.
Maybe it was when the Salute to ALCS MVPs Whose Names Begin With J float, upon which Jeremy Peña, Jose Altuve, Justin Verlander and Josh Hamilton each stood and raised his trophy high in the air, rolled by.
Maybe it was when Dusty Baker ascended to the podium and unbuttoned the jersey he wore managing his team to victory in the 2022 ALCS to reveal underneath the jersey he wore while playing in and winning the 1981 World Series.
Maybe it was when an enormous mechanical gavel, festooned with 62 Bronx-cultivated corpse flowers — once designated the official flower of New York’s northernmost borough — flailed atop the Sweet Justice float and absolutely nobody rose.
Maybe it was when a sudden gust of wind seemed to blow closed the retractable roof on the always dependable, ever popular Alibi Express bus, a staple of every Elimination Day Parade. Truly a technological marvel.
Or maybe people were most happy to simply partake of the frothy treats from the Big Papi Papaya Parfait Pop Up Shops placed every couple of blocks along the route. You can’t have an Elimination Day Parade without tasting the influence of David Ortiz.
Ah, Elimination Day. It makes every fall land just a little more softly. Kudos to the Sheadenfreude Commission for once more giving the good citizens of the Metropolitan Area something to revel in. There hasn’t been much otherwise lately.
We find joy in the unlikeliest of places… but the Phillies going to the World Series is like a serrated knife to the heart of every Mets fan.
celebrants where i was standing were swapping new lucky numbers of 3-6 and 102-69.
Misery loves company. Beyond that, I don’t especially celebrate when the Yankees lose except when the Yankees losing benefits the Mets, which means when it happens at the hands of the Mets. That being said, I do like that the Mets won 2 more than the Yankees 99 in the regular season.
The Phillies, on the other hand, are a division rival. A team we looked down on all season as fundamentally flawed in contrast to the fundamentally sound Mets. Indeed, the Phillies were flawed in ways that looked familiar to us because they resembled the flaws the Mets focused on fixing this season. Yet here they are—National League champions poised to follow in the recent footsteps of the Nationals and Braves. With Wheeler and Syndergaard to boot. At least they DFA’ed Familia.
On the current Bill Simmons podcast (the weekly “Guess The Lines” episode), “Cousin Sal” Iacono, a Mets fan, noted that the last 3 World Series champs have been the Nats, Dodgers and Braves, respectively, and now we are looking at a potential Philthies win. He then mused about whether the Marlins would be next, in effect wondering whether it could get any worse.
I hope that the Astros (metaphorically) terminate those scum with extreme prejudice, then dig them up and kill them again, because they didn’t die hard enough.
I think we all know who’s winning the WS this year, and it’s not a team whose name and city begin with P.
I don’t know that given that the 2019 Nationals and 2021 Braves both beat the favored Astros for their championships.
[1969 has entered the chat]
Always one of the happiest days of the year, right up there with Opening Day!
And the best part was how it all went down, with 50 strikeouts and Judge having a terrible series.
Part of me wants him to leave (not to the Mets, I don’t really care where), but a big part of me wants the Yanks to severely overpay him, and he will have a few more average, injured years, and then they all will be miserable.
There is no joy in this corner of Metville from the Yankees being eliminated. If we had languished in the Second Division this year, perhaps some small measure of satisfaction would have arisen, but all I can focus on is the golden opportunity lost, which feels like a missing limb. The pain of our quick “Exit Stage Left” lingers on. It is a bad time when you feel greater interest in the Arizona Fall League and Caribbean League results than in the Fall Classic. At least “ProbaBilly” Eppler has kept our top 19 prospects, thereby minimizing the likelihood of long-term negative outcomes by a number of standard deviations. In other words, we all need to feel good because the likelihood of even the best teams winning it all is only pi squared plus 4%, and we achieved a normalized result. Gee, I feel better already!
Did get some joy watching what happened in that billion dollar sewer in the Bronx.
But the sight of former Mets helping the Filthies beat the Padres was bad karma.
UGH##@!
Yeah, the sight of the Yankees getting ready to play golf is always welcome, but as Seth says, the thrill is diminished by the Phillies and their knuckle-dragging fans going to the World Series…the same World Series that one would’ve figured a team that finished 14 games ahead of them in the standings had a much better chance at. So sorry Greg, but my wife and I went to see Funny Girl the other day, and the girl who was funny sang something about raining on a parade, so you got your parade, but those skies don’t look promising.
And to get trolled by Noah Syndergaard, now pitching with an arm that the Mets and their insurance provider paid for, well, he’s rising towards the top of my least favorite ex-Mets list now.
And so the last laugh for the NL East was had by the Phillies. Who woulda thunk it…
But lets remember, Steve said 3-5 years. We got to the playoff in 2. We’re doing better than expected. So far Steve has not disappointed and I have no reason to believe that when the snow starts to thaw we will not better off then when we started. It wasn’t his fault that the real Lindor came to NY a year after he traded for him and extended his contract. It wasn’t his fault that the arms fell off our top three pitchers just when we needed them most. This will be corrected and we will go on to become the LA Dodgers of the East.
I do not fear, today is all about Faith for me.
The thing about “Elimination Day” is that it’s premised on the Yankees penciled into the playoffs seemingly every year.
As the underdog 2019 wildcard Nationals, 2021 88-win Braves, and now 2022 3rd wildcard Phillies show, the important thing is to just get into the playoffs. Then take the small sample shot. If Cohen’s investment into his (and our) Mets passion project means the team can be penciled into the playoffs every year like the Yankees, I’ll take it.
For all the consistent regular-season dominance by the Dodgers, they haven’t had a dynastic run of championships. They have the 1 won in an unusual season. The Astros have just the 1 from 5 years ago, won suspiciously. But they earn the chance to win a championship seemingly every year like the Yankees. Disgruntled Yankees fans are asking for more than that from Steinbrenner, Cashman, and Boone, but I don’t think it’s realistic of fans to demand more than consistent playoff qualification.
Hahahahahahaha
Nice how you got through that whole thing without once using the “Y” word. Nicely done.